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The most important person to take care of during divorce is … you

| Jun 10, 2021 | Divorce

There’s no way to sugarcoat or otherwise downplay the challenges and adversity linked with divorce in most instances.

For most people, notes one proven North Texas family law legal source, marital dissolution “is a difficult process.”

And that is understandable, right? Although some splitting couples are able to quickly end failed marriages in a largely uncontested manner, sticking points and matters of dispute are far more commonplace in Texas decouplings and other divorces nationally.

Candidly, there is often much to disagree about. The above source notes that the goal of “getting from point A to point B” on varied matters is often easier said than done.

Customary points of contention during the divorce process

Family law issues are dynamic and case-specific. Every divorce is flatly unique, with matters needing to be resolved spanning broad territory. Key focal points often revolve around issues ranging from child custody/visitation and spousal maintenance (alimony) to property division and more.

Such matters can singly or collectively ratchet up stress levels in a big way. And the tension they spawn can seem to grow exponentially, given the formal nature of divorce and its legally overseen nature. Participants can easily fixate on the details while ignoring something very important.

Namely, themselves.

Self-care: Don’t forget about this key divorce imperative.

You’re not a machine, obviously, but your body often acts like one and interacts with your mind and emotions in highly varied ways. Obviously, that integrated interaction can be affected significantly if you’re dealing squarely with divorce stressors.

That can make for real challenges, which any person needs to effectively manage in order to operate optimally during the divorce process and promote a best-case outcome.

One long-experienced psychologist with a special focus on divorce hurdles underscores for readers in a Divorce Magazine article how vital it is for an impending-ex to get a handle on stress and maintain good mental health. She offers up a number of tips, including these:

  • Identifying key stress catalysts and then taking concrete actions to minimize their effects
  • Giving in a bit to heightened emotions (translated: a good cry can be tremendously stress-relieving and therapeutic)
  • Learning to forgive past wrongs to the greatest degree possible (relevant to both your and your spouse’s behaviors)
  • Unwinding (whatever works, e.g., walks, workouts, meditation, music, cooking, time spent with loved ones and friends)
  • Counseling (professional help can make a huge difference)
  • Projecting realistically (seeing the post-divorce future in a positive way)

“Life is dynamic, nothing stays constant,” notes the Divorce Magazine author. “Mindfully go with the flow and believe in a better future for you.”